A Lively Report

There are times when the immensity of grief steals from us an imagination for brighter days. When loss eclipses any sense of tomorrow's sun rise and we fear that twilight will never come. If you happen to be in the midst of one of these, life's hopeless moments, I am eager to attest in the wake of my own loss that daybreak will come.

When closing Render Free's lounge + workspace, I had little sense for the joy waiting for me. Had I failed? Clearly, the dependability of my capacity was not to be trusted. The logic I subconsciously held (that if I worked hard enough I could earn the outcome I desired) was ousted and proven faulty. This was a painful epiphany.

Whether economic inequities, capricious community needs, my own limitation or Destiny herself is to blame, I am the beneficiary. In part, because fifteen months after the closing of our lounge and workspace, I share with you in deep gratitude that I have found the act that makes me come alive. 

Most miraculously, in my inability to maintain the version of community I envisioned, loss opened out upon a network of healing that has brought me a greater sense of belonging!

Now, my joy is to sit with folks, even in the midst of their loss, grief, confusion and uncertainty. We honor together our lost vision for belonging, safety and connection by admitting where there is lack.  We discover the instability of any internalized conditions of love, and by acknowledging the darkness, we bare witness to the dependable light of the dawn.

Join me -